Mofijesusewa Samuel
In the past, ladies used to shy away from asking guys out. But things have changed, and more women are taking control of their fate. So instead of sitting around and pinning after the guy or babe (wink-wink), you like, why not make a move. And while there’s every possibility that it may end in tears, you’ll never know if you don’t try.
However, because we want to help keep your chances of succeeding when you do get the balls to shoot your shot, we’ve compiled the ultimate guide to make things go smoothly. So get your reading glasses, pen and jotter out as we take you on a crash course on how to shoot your shot and get that hottie you’ve been eying.
1. Start by doing a little digging
if you like someone, the best way to avoid getting into a sticky situation when you shoot your shot is by making sure they are available. This means that your research must tell you if they are single and searching and a little about what they like. It will do you a world of good to know what you’re walking into before you make a move.
2. Try starting with a simple ‘hey’
If the person you fancy is already a friend or acquaintance or someone you see physically, you may want to start by simply saying hi. Then, strike up a simple conversation about something, no matter how basic it is. Just make sure you don’t look like a fangirl or love-struck teenager.
3. You can also start by simply replying to a piece of content
If you are internet friends or follow your crush on social media, one surefire way to get their attention is by engaging with their content. Don’t go about liking posts from three years ago like a stalker, but reply to stories or comment on new posts they make. If you respond to enough of his IG/Snapchat stories, he’ll notice you. And there you go, your opening. It’s now time to use your newfound connection to your advantage.
4. Don’t forget the power of humour
Everyone likes to laugh, and the best way to make someone feel comfortable talking to you is by cracking them up. So after you complete the initial contact, you can keep things light, airy and active by sending memes, jokes, or just generally funny things. You want to keep your crush’s attention by giving them a reason to laugh and, for lack of better words, ‘catch cruise’. The more fun they have with you, the more open they’ll be to future connections.
5. Compliment your crush
Try not to do this disgustingly. Instead, find authentic, non-physical things you like about them and compliment them about those things. The fact is if this person is cute or sexy, they already know it. Most likely, you won’t be the first or last person to compliment them about their physical features. So aim for something more profound than how they look.
6. Be open
One general mistake most ladies make when shooting their shot is trying to be coy. You want your crush to know you like them without being too bashful or vocal about things, at least for the first few days. But you also have to be ready to catch cues they may throw back at you if they feel you. If you are shooting your shot in person, being open will include your body language. This means you have to do things that show you are into the person without actually saying it. For example, look them in the eyes, act shy now and then, and laugh at their jokes. I know they sound stupid, but trust me, they work like magic!
7. Don’t overthink things
Women tend to overthink everything, but trust me when I say it’s not that deep. Shooting your shot is like ripping off a bandaid; you have to do it. So, cast all your fears aside and go for the kill. What’s the worst that will happen? Your crush will either say yes or no, and you’ll move on either way.
8. Be bold and tell your crush how you feel
Don’t beat around the bush, don’t play any games – use your words like an adult. Do not say anything extravagant either. A simple, “I like your vibe, we should go get a drink, bills on me”, should do the trick. If they say ‘no’, it will just save you time and energy, and you can move on to the next.
9. Avoid immediate confessions of affection
Do not be weird! When you do go out, do not push any ‘love’ agenda too quickly. Just be cool, enjoy the hangout and see if he matches your energy and if there’ll be another date. Dropping the ‘love bomb’ too quickly could end your chances before it even starts.
10. Do not make any extravagant gestures until the deal is sealed
This is just as crucial as avoiding the ‘love bomb’. Don’t do anything crazy like going over and cooking, cleaning, or having sex (unless that’s how you roll, then let your freak flag fly proud). Just make sure you don’t come across as desperate, no matter what you choose to do.
11. Remember that most guys don’t care how you get into a relationship if things work out
I spoke with a few guys before saying this, and trust me, forward-thinking and progressive men want to be asked out. So don’t worry that he’ll think you are a ‘bad’ girl if you shoot your shot. If someone does feel that way, then trust me, sis, you are better off without them. Is this 1962?
You have to remember that guys aren’t the pickiest bunch. They don’t even get enough attention, so most men would probably be flattered that you are shooting shots at them. But if your crush turns you down, you have to remember that you are not entitled to their acceptance, and they also don’t have any responsibility to return the energy. So what you need to do is take your ‘L’ nicely and move on to the next as the badass that you are.
Namaste!
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